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Well as promised, here is part two.
There is a process that we followed to get our minds to think in this wrong pattern, there is a few pit falls that we need to avoid. They are as follows:-
1.Sensitisation – Our nervous system over reacts to the emotion that is being presented.
2.Bewilderment – We are trying to work it all out, trying to answer the question?
3. Fear. – The emotion that is STRONGLY emphasised, that we RECOIL within ourselves.
There is a process that we have to follow to get out of the snare that we have allowed our minds to fall into. How do we manged this cycle of fear?
Here is the answer .. we do NOTHING but the following! It’s that simple ..
1. FACE the fear with a better UNDERSTANDING. Not adding 2nd FEAR
2. ACCEPT the feelings that come with the EMOTIONS, allow it all to happen.
3. FLOAT through the feelings and emotions, right to the end.
4. LET time pass, until we have fully accepted the feelings. BE PATIENT ….
The process seems simple, but does take alot of PRACTICE in getting it right, you have to see this process as a journey travelling in a train, you have NO CONTROL over when this train stops and starts. You have to always think of your journey as moving forward from one station to another. These stations are called SETBACKS, it’s in these setbacks that you will learn to PRACTICE the method of FACING, ACCEPTING, FLOATING and LETTIING time pass. This is no easy task, but with time and practise, it gets easier. These moments of SUFFERING when you practice, MUST be seen as the ANSWER to FULL recovery.
It is also very IMPORTANT to see the MOMENT right through to the END. It is at the end of this moment that you will find PEACE, but only for a short while, then the journey continues with more suffering, more practice and slowly but surely, you will learn to DE-SENSITISE your nervous system, the symptoms you experience will vary quite somewhat, but remember that these symptoms are just ONE BIG BLUFF … eventually you will arrive at a station called “FULL RECOVERY”. There is NO TIME FRAME here, it will vary from individual to individual, but you will recover.
In part three .. I will give you a list of the possible symptoms that one can experience while being BLUFFED by nerves that are over sensitsed … stay tuned.
Well to put it real blunt and simple, this is what I have learnt in the last few months from my own experience. It is nothing other than a state of mind that you find yourself in by the way “how you think’ !! … and what you think about …. It’s true …It’s how you respond to your emotions what we are talking about here. This is not an illness of the mind, but rather an illness of how you think !! I have come to the knowledge that this is called “NERVOUS ILLNESS” … let me try and explain….
The thoughts that spring to mind are coming from your sub-conscious mind, it’s normally thoughts that require an action of some sorts on your part, the thoughts you are thinking in this process requires an answer, and it is not forthcoming, and you keep thinking the thoughts that spring to mind. In other words, you DWELL on these thoughts….
Sometimes these thoughts triggers a “fear” emotion inside of you, this is called the 1st fear, then you ponder on the thought some more, and you yourself add more fear to the original thought, this is called 2nd fear, and this quickly de-generates into a disorder that we call panic, anxiety or depression.
There is a process that we followed to get our minds to think in this wrong pattern, there is a few pit falls that we need to avoid, so we do not get hung up by wrong thinking. I’ll share more about that in a later post.
The trick is … NEVER EVER get caught up in that 2nd fear !!… When you find yourself in this trap, there is a process that we have to follow to get out of the snare that we have allowed our minds to fall into.
More on this process later … stay tuned !! …
Well here we go, start of week 9. For those that are not aware what week 9 is all about, it is the number of weeks, since I have had an anti-depressant called Lexamil 10mg. After a tapering period and experiencing the classic withdrawal symptoms of brain zaps, light headedness, heavy headedness, you name it.. I had it .. maybe not as pronounced as someone that would go off an anti-depressant cold turkey, but i most certainly experienced them.
Well this weekend saw the start of me making use of a complete natural remedy for an anti-depressive solution. I started on a product called MindSmoothe and Purecalm. Now I know it’s way too early to actually report any symptoms worth noting, what I can say is this, that the “soccer ball” feeling that I have been reporting the last couple of weeks, has largely reduced to almost nothing since I started the natural remedy treatment.
I cannot be certain if it is related or not, but I do believe that it is related. When I started the course on Friday afternoon, I can quite honestly say that within the first 6 hours, there was definitely an improvement in the feelings.
So I shall continue with the course until the end. Apparently the duration of the course has to be at least 6 – 9 months. So I shall continue reporting my feelings and experiences throught the ordeal and write them here.
The natural remedies I am referring to are from http://www.feelgoodhealth.co.za For the record, I have attempted to start on natural remedies before, but I failed as I did not really understand the process of how this stuff works. When I started them the first time, it made me feel worse rather than better. Now I have learnt that there is a process that one has to allow the natural stuff to go it’s course pretty much the same way chemical processes do.
The period of take on here is 3 – 6 weeks … so we will see what happens after this period if the change was successfull or not, whatch this blog space …
Blog greetings .. 
Hi blog readers
I have now made it to the end of week 8 .. in other words, day 56 after stopping the use of taking an anti-depressive called Lexamil 10mg. The start of this week was a little shaky at first, the worst day was Monday, for some or other reason, I cannot explain exactly why, the good news however is I came through it.
This week, unlike other weeks, I have noticed an increase in the levels of anxiety. I made use of Rivotril only on Monday just to get stabilised. But as the week dragged on, I could feel the levels of anxiety increasing. So suffice it to say, I feel a little rough around the edges.
I was looking into the use of complete natural remedies for anxiety and/or depressive disorders this week. I don’t know why I have not thought about it sooner, but I am convinced that I would have had a much more smoother ride if I was to have used all natural remedies to assist in the withdrawal.
In the past, that is about 1 - 2 years ago, I attempted to go on a natural remedy that contained the ingredient called St. John’s Wort … But I failed as I never fully understood the process of what and how it works, and subsequently I gave up on it. I have been looking around the web for a local source of natural remedies and this week I found exactly what I was looking for.
I came across two very interesting web sites .. 1. http://www.onlinetherapist.co.za and 2. http://www.feelgoodhealth.co.za
Anyways, I decided that I was going to try the natural remedy offered called PureCalm and MindSoothe … so I will keep you posted on what effects these are having and if there are any real benefits in using this stuff or not.
By the way, the only reason why I am considering using this stuff now, is that I can definitely feel that the AD meds are now well and truly no longer in my system, and the after affects of the use of the AD has left it’s mark. So I think I need something to just calm the nerves a little to give me a smoother ride to the end.
My head still “feels like a soccer ball”, but if I compare it to say last week, there is some improvement, and if I compare it to say 4 weeks ago, there is major improvement. So overall, I have to say, although the improvement is slow, it is steadily happening, one thing for sure is, it’s not getting worse, on the contrary, it’s definitely getting better.
I cannot wait to see this last symptom take a final hike and be out of here… and I so long to the day, that I can say, it’s finally all over. No more symptoms, no more struggling, no more anxiety.
God help us all in this endeavor to get to that place of absolute peace and quiet within ourself, we have to make a concious choice to TRUST and FULLY rely in God who is madly in love with His creation….. Blog greetings..
Well after having a 1/4 tab of 0.5 mg Rivotril, I have somewhat managed to regain control of the ill feelings I have been experiencing earlier today.
I am still coping with a cold & flu like symptom which started almost two weeks ago, and it was almost gone, when it appears that the same symptoms are back again. I have started another course of Advil CS, to counter the runny / stuffy nose. Over the weekend I attempted to use sinutab to alleviate these symptoms.
I am still battling with a symptom that makes my head feel like under pressure, a heaviness, almost like a dull headache, not sure what to call it. This just seems to aggrevate the current circumstances. It is rather confusing as I cannot tell if this is just cold/flu symptom related or a genuine withdrawal symptom from the use of an anti-depressant called Lexamil as it has now been 8 weeks since I have used it, the only drug that I have used since then is rivotril from time to time as the need arises. As far as I know, the lexamil drug should now most definitely have worked out of my system, however, there is the lasting effects that the drug has had on my brain that I am now contending with.
I have decided to take another 1/4 tab of 0.5 mg of rivotril again this afternoon to settle down the anxiety I am experiencing. So the total for the day would be 1/2 tab of 0.5mg for the day so far. What makes the feelings worse here, is that the muscles in my back tend to tense up and cause some measure of discomfort. Taking the rivotril does make a difference to me under these circumstances. I am thinking “maybe I should use it more often” until the cold/flu symptoms have completely abated. My concern about this is the habit forming properties that is associated with rivotril. I’ll check with my doctor and get some advice on the matter. Just for the record, I have NOT used any Rivotril since 1 week ago, when I was away visiting with family that I have not seen for quite some while, the dosage then was 1/4 tab of 0.5mg and I took it twice. So that makes the total a 1/2 tab in total for the day.
Blog greetings …
Well it’s Monday morning, and it’s the start of week 8. This weekend was a little tough for me, I cannot explain it, but i’ll try… for some or other reason, I feel alot more tense than usual. We visited with some friends on Saturday afternoon. Upon returning from the visit I felt extremely anxious, a feeling I know very well and have learnt to recognise in the last few months. This caught me by surprise as I was pretty certain that last week saw the last of the last symptoms of the withdrawal. Apparently I was wrong.
Now normally I would resort to taking a 1/4 tab of 0.5 mg Rivotril to help me over the speed bump, but I decided not to do it this time, as I cannot keep depending on it as a crutch.
The cold and flu symptom I had last week are still with me, in the form of a heavy head, my head feels like a soccer ball. (That’s the best way I can describe it).. Whenever this feeling appears, I seem to think that it is a symptom of high blood pressure. When I do measure my blood pressure it is a little elevated, typically about 145/90 ..
Anyways, it is now Monday morning, and I am writing this blog from work, and I must tell you I feel terrible today, for lack of a better word. I have just taken a 1/4 tab of a 0.5 mg Rivotril to help me get through this day. I feel worked up and tense, I cannot explain why ?????
Well, today marks the start of week 7 after a tapering period, then stopping taking Lexamil as an anti-depressive drug.
At the moment I am kind of getting mixed symptoms as I am also having to deal with a minor cold / sinus congestion. I am definitely at the tail end of the cold as well as the withdrawal from Lexamil.
The only symptom that seems to keep cropping up now and again is like a heaviness in the head, but I seem to think that this is mostly due to the sinuses that are blocked up because of the cold. When I take some ADVIL CS to keep the sinuses clear, the heaviness also clears.
The after effects like the brain zaps and light headedness now appears to be something of the past, there is absolutely no question about that. I will keep monitoring the situation for another week or two and then present a synopsis of the entire experience.
Other than the cold and flu symptoms I have nothing major to report. I even managed a long distance road trip that lasted a total of 12 hours driving in a motor car over the week with no major setbacks to report at all. All went well … So it’s all GOOD !!!
Blog greetings …
Ok I have been without any Lexamil anti-depressant medication now for almost 6 weeks, by this coming Saturday it will be exactly 6 weeks. This week so far has been the best ever, although I still have a few symptoms hanging around of a cold, stuffy nose and the like, nothing too serioius, been treating that with Sinumax for the past 3 days, and is definitely clearing up, I recon it should all be cleared up by the end of the week.
Other than the cold, I feel GREAT. I can really say, that life is beginning to get back to normal for me now, and I must say, it feels GOOD. I am now not dependant on any drugs to get me through the day, and have no more need to take Rivotril either. So far ALL is good. If someone had to ask, ”how does that make you feel” .. I am so glad you asked. .. It makes me feel like I have won an awesome VICTORY ! over this dark cloud, depressive and debillitating problem that I have experienced the last few months.
Was it worth it ? Well the jury is still out on that one, all I can say at this stage is, I do not wish this experience on my worst enemy, it has not been a very pleasant experience, to say the least. Was it successful .. well .. I cannot argue with that one, the medication did help get me over the all important hurdle a few months back. If there was another alternative to consider at the time, I would rather have chosen that, whatever that might have been. Perhaps, a herbal solution, or perhaps a “grit your teeth and fight your way through it” approach, that may have helped, cannot be really certain about that.
What I can say is this, I have learnt much about this problem, and I now know that this is a world wide problem of mega proportion. The sad thing I think is this, that doctors seem to prescribe anti-depressives WAY to easily .. coz I think it’s an easy way out. Instead of actually working through the problems with a patient, or making a referral to some sort of counselling phycologist, that is skilled in targeting the problem with CBT (cognative behaviour therapy).
If you are reading this blog, and you are suffering from any of the symptoms that I have described, please … feel free to drop me a note, any time. I will be very glad to try and help in any way I can. I found out that by talking to someone else about the issues that are on your mind, it always seems to help it along in a positive direction.
You keep well .. Blog greetings. ..
Well today I feel much like a brand new person. It’s almost unbelieveable . I have to pinch myself to make sure that I am not dreaming ! It really feels good. I do not know if it’s got something to do with the fact that I have a stuffy nose, (a cold) which at this stage is very minor, but I feel like it’s all over, as suddenly as that? The withdrawal symptoms that I have been experiencing the last few weeks appears to be something of the past …. Praise God, Hallelujah !!
If I had to rate the last couple of weeks, on a scale, 1 – 10, then last week, I would say 8/10, the weeks prior to that 5-6/10 … Today I will rate a 9.5/10. .. The only reason why it’s not 10/10 .. because I have a cold, which I believe is almost something of the past, as most of the symptoms were evident over the weekend already.
It’s awesome, I feel like the real me. I found that yesterday morning I still took a 1/4 tab of a 0.5 mg Rivotril. “Just in case”, so I can enjoy the day, had an exceptional sunday morning experience in church, where there was a strong presence of God during the morning worship service. I would like to think that being in the presence of a Holy God, is why I am in this state today.
So where to from here? .. well lets see what happens, I’ll keep reporting my feelings and experiences here, I only hope that the experiences I am reporting here, will be of great help to many people out there, reading this blog.
Greetings.
I have been enjoying going for short walks this week, not long, it lasts about 15 – 20 mins or so. I walk at least until I break out into a sweat. This way I know that something is happening. I can feel that after only 4 days of doing this short walk, that when I get to the end of the walk, that it is starting to get a little easier every time. This is to be expected. Next week, will probably try and walk a little farther, and in so doing, will get more and more exercise.
It will be quite interesting to see how much weight I may have lost this week, if any at all. I have made some minor adjustments in my eating habits this week. I hasve started cutting down quite dramatically on the sugar and milk intake while having coffee or tea at work. I expect, that this together with the exercise will translate into some weight losses. My target weight over the next 4 – 6 weeks is 70Kg. I currently weigh, 76.6Kg.
I am still using Rivotril as a help to alleviate the symptoms of Lexamil withdrawal, which definitely seems to help. My head still feels like a soccer ball at times, it’s not always there. It seems to come and go. I am being cautious in using this benzo, as I definitely do not want to build any dependence on it at all.
Now and again, when I turn my head, I still feel the odd brain zap feeling, but even this feeling is reducing day by day, in small amounts. It looks like with this process, that one has to be extremely patient with it and not expect sudden results.
Looking at the blood pressure measurements, it looks like things are beginning to stabilise, so that is looking much better than last week.
So we continue .. expecting a good result and the end ..
Greetings .. .M
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